Talking to children

[radegund]

[Cross-posted to radegund and plan_survive]

Our lovely GP is on holidays, and Oisín has a HORRIFIC nappy rash, so this morning we went to see the other doctor in the practice. ("Woman doctor! Woman doctor!", Oisín remarked as we followed her into her room. "Do you hear that?" she said to the receptionist. "Hilarious, isn't it?")

I hadn't met her before as she's started there only recently; she's young and seemed friendly. But as soon as she addressed Oisín, my hackles hit the roof. She adopted a viscous tone and raised her voice as though talking to someone hard of hearing, and she made no attempt whatsoever to understand his reponses to what she said. "We'll have a look at your sore botty, make it all better, hm?" seems innocuous enough (if you're more tolerant than I am of "botty" and "hm?", not to mention the proposition that merely being examined by a doctor is sufficient to effect a cure), but believe me when I say that the tone in which it was delivered made it quite clear that she might as well have been addressing a lump of putty as a human being. She sounded like a stereotype of a harrassed teacher.

Anyway, she had a look at the rash and began to tell me about the cream she was prescribing. Then Oisín asked to go back to the waiting room (where there are toys), and ... she just kept on talking. I explained to Oisín that I was still talking to the doctor, but he continued to ask, beginning to get agitated. She cut in with "You have to stay here with Mammy for a few more minutes - is that OK with you?" - and again, it's difficult to get across how utterly uninterested she appeared to be in any possible answer he might have to her question.

I said, "What do you want to do in the waiting room - play with the toys?" Oisín nodded, and the doctor, again in her Teacher voice (and patently responding to my question, not his response), said, "Oh! Look what we have HERE!" and took one of those bead maze things out from behind the electric heater and put it on the floor. Oisín isn't that pushed about bead mazes at the moment, but he had now spotted the biggish basket of other toys from which it had been taken. So we moved the heater aside, and he played happily with two bears and a sheep and a mole-like creature while the doctor finished her speech about the cream (Timodene, incidentally - any experiences?).

It's only now, looking back on it, that I realise that she didn't once allude to the fact of Oisín's being in relatively acute PAIN, or mention what we might do to alleviate that. (We've been giving him Calpol, which seems to help a little.)

Dear Doctor,

I trust that as you gain experience in your chosen career you will eventually learn that CHILDREN ARE PEOPLE.

That is all.

yours,
Radza

=============================

OK. Rant over. I realise that my annoyance stemmed mainly from this doctor's inexperience with small children. She may not in fact be long qualified, and she may be caught in the trap of thinking she has to appear omniscient, omnipotent, etc., which may lead to her deciding that impersonating a teacher is the best way to interact with children. I don't know. But I can't help feeling that a bit of straightforward EMPATHY wouldn't go amiss. And I won't be keen to go back to her the next time our usual GP (whose manner is A MILLION MILES away from what I've described) is unavailable. Grargh.

Comments

[dreamvirus.livejournal.com]

Some people just don't GET children. As in, they can't interact with them. My mother is one. Watching her utterly fail to relate to my smaller cousins makes me wonder what she was like with me and Roisin. Certain personality quirks of ours explained, probably. Roisin can't relate to kids either. She says "I just don't know what to say or do!" I find it much easier than relating to adults. It's so straightforward. And so OBVIOUS that they are unique and thinking people, if you just listen to them.

[ainetl.livejournal.com]

hopefully it was just a bad day for her or otherwise i'm not very confident that she'll catch on. she must have to do some sort of clinical rotations before she gets her license, so i wouldn't use young an inexperienced as an excuse. (not to mention i wonder how she gets on in personal life...) glad you don't have to see her on a regular basis!

i hope little Oisín gets some relief quickly, poor thing!