Gender equivalence

[radegund]

A stray thought fluttered past my prefrontal cortex just now, and I thought it worth recording.

I hear, on occasion, the truism that the sexism inherent in society is illustrated by the difference in connotation between gendered pairs of words - master/mistress, poet/poetess, bachelor/spinster and so on. (These pairs fascinate me, I confess - particularly the more debatable ones, such as tailor/dressmaker or chef/cook.)

It occurs to me that I've never heard of a male equivalent of the "Dear John letter" - you know, the one that a woman writes to her husband, out on whom she is walking Without a Word of Warning.

[Poll #629978]

The thing that strikes me, you see, is that the application of such a familiar, jokey tag to the notion of an "I'm leaving you" letter reduces it, circumscribes it, makes it less threatening. The "Dear John letter" is not written by a strong woman, striking out for the sunlit uplands: it's all slightly pathetic and drippy and embarrassing, and That's Women For You. You wouldn't take it seriously. Pre-emptive devoicing, as it were.

Or am I wildly off base, here?

And in conclusion:

[Poll #629979]

Comments

[seldom2.livejournal.com]

Interesting subject... I, too, thought those originated during the war. And it does seem to be restricted to english-speaking women/letters. Certainly no Dear Gérard letters in France. Anywhere else?